Hi everyone, thank you for reading my blog. I write this blog, for you guys, the readers. This article on the 6 Basic Human Needs was inspired after a chat I just had with a great friend of mine. With her permission, I wanted to share some parts of our chat.
My friend today revealed that she recently broke up with her boyfriend. To give you a little background, she told me that she was dating her boyfriend for about a year and were living together. Being a good friend I felt that I should try to comfort her. So during our phone conversation she asked me the question of why she wasn't crying? She said she only felt a little sad and hurt, but overall was handling the situation well. I really didn't know what to answer her. I usually shy away from giving advice when I'm not too certain with the surrounding facts of a situation. After conversing with my friend a few more minutes, we hung up.
Afterwards, I felt and knew there was more I could've done. An answer she could use to help her. So I turned to my mentor for many things it seems nowadays, Tony Robbins. A little background, if you haven't ready any of Tonys Books, Unlimited Power, or Awaken the Giant Within, it's a must read! A great source to find Tony is youtube. After texting my friend several videos that Tony did on relationships, I had a breakthrough mental moment.
Tony teaches that the 6 basic human needs are 1. Certainty 2. Uncertainty 3. Love 4. Significance 5. Growth 6. Contribution. It dawned on me that these 6 basic needs apply to almost everything that's important to us. It can be applied to why we stay or don't stay at a job or profession. Why we make the life decisions that we made in the past. Why some relationships, business or intimate work out or not. Let me go over each need individually.
Certainty, we all need it. It's our foundation, our safe haven. We all need to know that we have friends we can depend on. We need to know our loved ones will always love us no matter what. We all desire that if we do a particular thing, life will guarantee a particular result. Next is uncertainty. My friend asked me about why uncertainty is here on the list of human needs. My response. Balance. Uncertainty brings variety in our life. It brings excitement, it can bring passion, new possibilities. It's a counter balance to the boring and predictability of certainty in our lives.
Love, this human need I feel brings a lot of various interpretations . So I'll share mine. Love is our life's true purpose, our mission. Every religion, god(s) talks about it. Expressing it in many forms. Love is the fuel, that drives us when we are true to our core, our center. For relationships, I read once, that love is not a destination. Couples use love as a noun, thinking it's a place or destination they reach. That's a mistake. Use love as a verb. If your significant other isn't responding to you, love them. Just love, it's a verb, not a noun.
Significance, something we all crave. Deep down I feel all humans want to feel important. Feel like they made a difference in the lives of their children. Feel like they made a difference at work, at home with their spouse. Feel like they're making a difference in this world. It's why we have so many great charities. Outlets for people to do what they love. Which segue ways into the last 2 needs. Growth and Contribution. The needs of the spirit. Growth, the minute it stops, physically, spiritually, emotionally, life will stop, including relationships, business or personal. Contribution, like growth, are needs of the spirit. When one learns to serve others, rather than just themselves, true fulfillment happens.
Think about this folks, these 6 basic needs should really be renamed the 6 essential pillars, foundations for all our relations to this world. Our relations to our spouses, our businesses, our passions, relations with others, relations with our selves, children, parents, and others there's too many to list. To have extraordinary relationships to anything we're involved with, we need to have all 6 of these needs met. Missing even one, will result in just ordinary relationships, and ultimately a unfulfilled and most possibly, a failed relationship.
Thank you again for reading the blog and article. Feel free to share this with anyone. Hope this article filled all 6 of your needs : )
Definitely, your friend may have been lacking in her basic needs. I wanted to append to your knowledge on relationships with knowledge from one of my best friends. He gave me some advice in high school that I remember to this day. It is only one concept. You can not share love with another until you are able to love life by yourself. In other words if you are not content do not seek completeness through another person. First, seek happiness and love of your own life and then seek to share that same emotion. Many times we are frustrated because we are not sharing our love we are sharing our discontent. Timing is very valuable in one's journey.
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